Quick dispensation with the prostration that every blog owner must inevitably perform:
errr uhhh sorry I haven’t updated in a while guys.
I meant to write/post more while I was traveling in Asia, then I didn’t. Then I felt bad about not writing more, so I stopped logging into this site. Then five months passed. Then again, it’s not like I had the bus in Asia, so why do I need to write about it here. Anyways, that trip was (mostly) very good. I went to Thailand, Laos, Vietnam, and South Korea. Ask me about it sometime, if you haven’t heard me ramble about it already.
Back to the bus. The bus is fine. Pretty much the same. I’m in the bus right now. We’re in Rocky Top, Tennessee, heading to Cincinnati.
The bus weathered the winter — mostly. Must’ve left some water in the pipes during a December freeze. Leaks were discovered when things thawed. I had to (get my friend David to help me) fix a critical leak in the freshwater tank. The kitchen faucet still leaks at an uncomfortable volume whenever the water pump is turned on, rendering the entire water system aboard less-than-usable. The bus continues to rumble on unaffected. The occupant/operator makes do with gallon jugs of well water from home stashed in the shower until he replaces the faucet.
The only thing that’s completely ceased the bus’s forward momentum so far: MUD.
The bus has been parked on a pretty-solid patch of yard since I brought it home. It’s been there through the winter snow we got this year, and innumerable thundershowers in my eight months of ownership. It’s been dicey a couple times, but it’s always managed to depart the driveway without issue.
This last week of non-stop showers proved too much. Each successive storm set off a little “I hope the bus doesn’t get stuck in the yard” alarm in my head, but I didn’t attempt to move it from it’s saturated parking space until I had the whole thing packed and I was an hour behind my intended departure schedule.
Cranked it, put it in reverse1, bus nudged backwards. Started to feel some confidence. Might’ve said something to the effect of “Oh yeah baby, we’re moving”. Shifted it into drive, got it about six feet forward…and not one inch further. Definitely said something to the effect of “FUCK GODAMMIT PLEASE NO”
Back driver’s side wheels sunk in the muck. Tried rocking the bus forward and back, to gain some momentum and traction. Tried filling the deepening groove with gravel. Tried wedging some cardboard and bath mats under the wheels. Enlisted the help of my generous and ingenious neighbors, who helped scheme and forage additional bus-liberation tools.
In addition to the gravel, cardboard, and bath mats, we tried various combinations of the following: branches, foraged sheet metal, an old shovel handle, roofing shingles, a skate deck, bag of cat litter. Futile attempts to give those wheels something, anything to latch onto. Tried to get it out for the better part of three hours, until we ran out of daylight and novel household items to sacrifice to the Mud God.
Woke up this morning, still couldn’t move, waved the white flag and called a tow truck. Dude got me out an hour later.
May the generations of family that lived there before me forgive me for the state I left my Grandmother’s yard in as I left this morning.2
A month in Cincinnati. Going to help out at the summer camp my sister is running for the kids in the Lydia’s House community. A good use of surplus summer free time, and a reasonable 500-mile trip from Ola to Ohio. Already signed up to chaperone a Savannah Bananas baseball game and aiming to get into town in time tomorrow for a group pizza-making dinner. Stoked.
Stopped for the night in Rocky Top at a church near the interstate, tucked away on a big hill down a couple side roads. The Rocky Top Worship Center welcomes travelers, but it’s just me up here in the lot tonight. Grateful that I had enough cell reception out here to stream game 6 of the NBA east finals with dinner.
Used the gas generator to power the microwave for 60 seconds in order to heat some rice to go along with the most satisfying tin of sardines I’ve had in recent memory.
Don’t need a functioning kitchen sink to prepare the perfect bus dinner.
Now for a variation of the inevitable vow that every person with a blog makes after updating it for the first time in a while:
I promise I won’t go as long without updating this blog again!!! Or at least I won’t cease posting abrubtly after posting seven pictures of t-shirts with barely any context and then nothing else.3
- I usually back up the bus a couple feet before pulling forward and angling the bus out of the driveway. ↩︎
- Also the people who are still alive and nearby who have to look at that big ass muddy kitty litter-filled trench. I’ll deal with it when I get back I promise. ↩︎
- A better blogperson would’ve implemented some kind of rudimentary mailing list so you could elect to automatically receive future bus.hair updates. This would be a great feature to coincide with this, the first post in months. However it’s 2am and I don’t know how to do that and I’m just going to go to bed. Next time!!! ↩︎
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